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Gong Gong

By Kathy Mak
the cigarette stench waffles through the tiny room
he sits on a rusted two legged stool
resting one arm on the counter
by the water kettle and homely pottery cups
a soft stream of light sifts through the
hoard of piled goods on the top bunk
he fishes out a puffy brown leather wallet
worn in the middle           edges cracked
packed with hundred dollar bills                
hardship          sweat          melancholy
he holds out three bills for me to take
“Gong Gong …”
my fingers close around the hidden values
a small bowl of rice
a small round tin plate of dried salt fish
worth more than the triple digit denominations

​ 
the computer hums a low steady tune
meticulous taps fire against the keyboard
my breath holds short in certain instances
until the lump in my throat fades
before I breathe in
schoolwork has always been a priority
            must get it done
            must get it done
my pinkie slams onto the backspace
the ruby red lines disappear
the kitchen phone rings off from faraway
my eyes fixate on the tumbling script
a muddled current of voices break through
            I don’t care
            I don’t care
bile rises       the silvery foam of saliva thickens
the plain taste of chapped water
footsteps plunge down the corridor

 
“it’s worse than I thought
mom doesn’t believe it
they found him in his apartment –”

 
clicks     stop      
eyes     on      my       sister
the
        words
                       cave
                                      in

​
his plaque sits by the far left
next to an empty slotted box     
against the petite vase decorated with simple plastic flowers
forever resilient
a pottery bird peeks from among
 
“Chui Wa don’t worry about me
look I can take care of myself
a lui’s grown up
all is well”
 
he was my grandpa
I love him

Kathy Mak is an emerging writer who aspires to publish a novel one day. She has completed an online creative writing course called Lit Mag Love with Rachel Thompson, and an online fiction course with the University of Iowa. She lives in Vancouver, British Colombia.
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